Finding my place again

It's been quite a long time since I last posted something on this blog.
The reasons, and quite possibly the excuses, are many: the studies that were culminating in the last semester, work, lack of an ongoing choreographic project...
Yet, the lack of posts does not represent the lack of inspiration. I thought about this blog very often, but I felt like I needed to have more time available to myself in order to fully be able to focus on it.

Having very recently moved to another country and staring a brand new chapter in my life makes me feel that now I am free from all the reasons/excuses and through this change I am finding the focus that I was seeking all along.
I'm finding myself feeling free of many of the things/thoughts that were holding me back.
I'm starting to find my place again in the world in the midst of this amazing transformation that is happening right now in my life.

But before I move on into my future plans regarding choreography, contemporary dance, and artistic practice, I must first reminisce of my work and practice so far.
I want to dive into the process I was into in last year's Kinitiras Choreography Lab and finish my documentation of the whole process and the work derived from it - [hjärtslag] - and then do the same for Viento Perdido, and the most recent process in this year's Lab - Plasticscape(s). 

As close as it can get [almost]

Do you about that feeling that starts gathering in your body while a work moves into the production phase and when everything stop being just about the movement?
When other elements start coming into play, such as, staging, lighting, music, performance clothes, etc.?
Well, this moment has arrived for Viento Perdido and we are not less than two weeks away from the performance evening.

Being responsible for almost everything that has to do with your piece and the performance of the piece to an audience is very unique experience.
You've passed the first stage where you were only a dancer/performer and all other decision depended on other people and you move to the place were you were also responsible for the creation of the movement; the responsibility of the choreographer.
And then you've passed that stage too, and started assuming all kinds of different roles and responsibilities relevant to the elements mentioned above.
Going through all of these stages definitely makes me more stressed because I want everything to work out as planned, but it also makes me feel more mature and that I have grown immensely compared to who I was a few months ago.

Working on every new piece kind of makes me feel this way simply because that is the reality of life. You start creating something new, you put all your effort in, your committ to it, and you end being just one more step ahead of yourself than who you were when you began this new adventure. This might sound confusing - or I may have just written it in a confusing way! - but this entire process carries great meaning. That is how we proceed in life; we create, we learn, we struggle, we exhaust ourselves, we envigor ourselves. In the end, we try to become better that who we were yesterday and feel proud of our achievements and creations.


As we are about to hit the studio hard this coming week, as it is the week before the performance week, I cannot help but fall into a duality of feelings and mindset. I am stressed, in a good way, and I am so excited at the same time.
Every experience is a new experience and I just want to make the most out of it - as a dancer/performer, a choreographer, and all these new roles that have come up my way.

  

       

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Not just one body anymore

Up until the moment I started thinking about what I wanted to do for a choreographic proposal back in September I have been alone, so to speak. 

I stood alone in my creative and choreographic thoughts...I stood alone in rehearsal for pieces of mine...I stood alone on the performance space. 

But, the moment I decided to start writing my proposal for PCDP (Professional Choreographic Development Project) I knew that I wanted to work with more than one bodies in space. 

This was the challenge I wanted to take up. 

However, until fairly recently the process had to begin with me being alone in mind and space to extend the choreographic intention and allow it to acquire form in body movement. Not as a rigid and strict structure, but as a framework within which I wanted to place all the bodies and evolve from that point onwards. 

Before getting into the studio with the rest of the dancers, I did not know what to expect; neither from them nor myself! Yet, this sense of unexpectedness is what I find appealing in art and, more specifically, in dance. I don't like the movement to be anticipated by anyone, not even myself. I just throw in my ideas, concepts, thoughts, intentions and impulses and start building up from them and from the dancers. I see, observe and listen. The way the same concept or idea might be perceived and interpreted by a different mind and body is just mindblowing. It reaffirms the uniqueness each individual carries with her/him. And the movement that is created then is coming truly from the inside out. It almost like the concept in the film Inception: you 'plant' a thought, a seed, that starts growing and you have the opportunity to witness that growth and translation into movement. 

Personally, I am a firm believer and supporter of each dancer's unique qay of movement and perception and I really enjoy researching and working on the different perceptions of ideas and interpretations on the movenent. This way, no two dancers can be and look the same, feel the same, and perform the same.

And although, I do want to throw in moments of unison and accumulation and mix up my pieces, I want to show what distinguishes us from one another in terms of movement. No two bodies are the same as no two minds are alike. I can't of you to do exactly as I do as you cannot ask that of me. Obviously, we do see that a lot in dance where there are numerous choreographers who want their dancers to be what they ahve envisioned them to be. But this does not necessarily mean that they can be like that or that their bodies can extend to that imagination. In my mind, I see a constant dialogue between the choreographer and the dancer. There has to be communication between these two entities because otherwise you might lose the essence of what body movement is all about. 

Based on these thoughts I am proceeding now in unraveling the layers of not one, but three bodies, and then attempt to tie them together. 

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